Friday, August 20, 2010

          Today was well not a very good day, hate to say it but I seem to not have very many good days lately. I was 10$ off at work and well I am trying so hard but I just seem to suck at work.

          Really the only time I felt good today was when I was tending to Oryon. I trimmed his nails, cleaned his ears, and he let me doctor his neck. It is healing quite good. I have found out he likes it when I use the q-tip soaked in peroxide, rather than the syringe filled with it. I think it is because the sound doesn't scare him, plus my moving the q-tip on the scab probley feels good. I mean it must itch something awful. I just wish that I could have found the grub awhile ago before it had gotten so bad. Well at least I know for future reference.

Tomorrow I drop off more job applications. Wish me luck my readers.

work sucks

Well life is crazy. First off work is not going well, I really do not think banking is my thing. I would love to do something that deals with Animals or retail. I have taken steps to try to improve things at work to the best of my ability, but have decided that if I still am unhappy there when my divorce is final that it is time for me to move on. If I were to get a wonderful job opportunity also I would take that as a sign as well.
    My six month old kitten has had a cold. Runny noise, coughing and just feeling poorly. After a week I decided to get him an appointment at the vet on my next day off. I had also read that colds are normal for cats and really nothing to worry about except the young and old should get checked out. He also had a bump on his neck which I though only a swollen gland until the morning of his appointment, for it started to puss. Good thing he is going to the vet I said to myself. Well the poor little cat had a respiratory infection and a grub in his neck. The vet said that he must have been near a Bunnie nest for bunnies are their normal host. Well the cat was tranquilised and the grub was cut out of his neck. The Vet let me watch, it was all very fascinating. You see animal care is one of my potential career fields that I am looking at getting into. The little guy also got some shots and is now on an antibiotic that covers both the neck and the respiratory infection. He is going to be just fine. You can bet though that any bump on him is going to get a thoroughly investigation from now on.
    Well now on to the happy things. I am to go into the city today with the family, I believe we are going to watch a movie. That means Movie Popcorn. A rare treat for me, especially since I have been on my diet. We are also going to do a little shopping where I will be picking up a new pair of badly needed tennis shoes. I have also had my first purchase on Etsy.com. Someone finally brought a necklace from me. I am so excited and hope it becomes a trend after all my hand made jewelry is very pretty.
    Spike is doing extremely well and trying to take care of his kitty brother. Oryon is doing well despite the hole in his neck. Me I am sure I will fare some how.

Thanks for reading and take care

Friday, August 6, 2010

The Job

Part of attaing and keeping freedom is having a source of income. Well I have a part-time job at the bank in town. I love it, only I dont have enough hours to make enough money. So in addition to my average three day a week job, I am attempting to pick up another part time job. I figure 2 to 3 nights a week and weekends would be good. I have applied at two restraints and one gas station so far and have applications for two more restrains. I also have to another restraint and gas station to visit and get applications for. So wish me luck in getting another job. I know, I know you are all thinking that I should go back to school, and I will as soon as I find out what I want to do and can do. I have some ideas. Right now I have so many debts from my marriage and my credit is in ruin, well I figured a couple of years of work, then I can go back to school with less worries. When I go to school I want to be able to concentrate on school.

My current job, I really like, even if my head teller never seems to  have anything nice to say to me about my performance. Which by the way is very good for someone who has her job at her first all American Bank. I am normally always a few min early, at my station and ready to go. Always nice to the clients and perform my duties extremely well, except for when there is something I am supposed to be doing that she  neglected to teach/tell me. She seems always to preach and worry about the professionalism, when she is always having long conversations with clients and I once saw her flossing her teeth in the teller line.

I had never thought working for this bank would be so different from the one I had been at. This bank is so lean-ant when it comes to seeing IDs, and cashing two/three party checks. I have to memorize everyone in towns name. The phone calls to clients are so different.  The fact that the manager actually helps clients. All in all even with the fast differences in the bank I like this job much more than the last. I just need to learn this banks "ways".

Thursday, August 5, 2010

New Town, New Job, New Pet

After a month of living job less trying to figure things out I moved to a small town, in a vacant trailer next to my father and step mother. With-in the first week on a Monday I interviewed for a job at the local bank, with in two weeks I was higher d  and off to Customer Service Representative  school. School was located in Flint Mi, luckily my hotel was in a nicer suburb type place. Flint is a very scary place for a small town girl such as my self. I missed my dog, to whom had been through a deployment, many field training exercises, and the dissolution of my marriage. He had to remain behind with my dad and step mom, a week is a long time to be with out your furry companion though.

The teachers of the class were so very nice, and I learned a lot. The other girls in the class were very nice as well. I learned more and more about the company I worked for and felt better and better working for such a company.

I had a week of enjoying the pool, reuniting with Parana bread, ordering in pizza, and pet smart. When I am in Pet Smart I always look at the kitty's for adoption, normally I am unable to take any home or anything of the such but I figure my few min of attention will make there furry lives a little happier even for a few minuets. You see I love animals.

They had kittens. Oh no I had been planning on getting a kitten sometime soon anyway, to keep Spike company while I was at work, to keep my home pest free (i live in the country) and well after my Gir cat died a year earlier I had wanted another kitty it was time. Just for the fun of it I decided to ask about the adoption process, turned out I could handle it. I couldn't take him to the hotel, but oh it turned out that they could keep the kitten till I left on Friday. I had wanted a black female, love black cats, none there but there were two little boys, one a gray tabby and one I am not sure what you would call him only he was pretty. I was interested in the pretty one, but when they put the gray tabby in my arms, it was love, a total connection, the planets aligned. I held the other just to be sure and nothing. My grey tabby was called MJ and when placed in my arms he purred and gave me little kitty kisses. He was the one.

I had to leave my little guy until Friday, I then went shopping for supplies. During the whole week I tried to think of a name for the little one. I wanted something special, I though of Perseus, Citizen, Ra, Odin and then settled with Oryon. I wanted a hunter so why not name him after the hunter in the stars. Oryon it was.

Trying to Attain a Divorce

I didn't even have a chance to get a lawyer before I had to answer the complaint for divorce, so I had to do it by myself with the help of legal aid over the phone. It was completed. I soon with the help of my mother and stepfather got a lawyer. Papers were filed and the proceeding were on the way. Then it came to the attention that my ex husband had not signed the complaint for the divorce his mother had. That was corrected and then it came to the attention that the divorce was not the correct county. My ex-husband nor I had ever lived in that county, it had only been filed there for my ex-husbands mother lived there. Well the validity of the divorce would be in question if continued there since the court had no jurisdiction. There was no way that I was going to let the validity be questioned, I want him out of my life, I want to be free.

It has finally been re-filed in the correct county. I have answered the complaint for divorce and requested what I want in the settlement. Now it is a waiting game, but there is a lot that needs to be done while I wait.

Escape from Germany

After the night my marriage was set for divorce, I moved in with my best friend, since our husbands were away we figured we could support each other, and split various bills.

I had enjoyed my time in Germany, but when it was time for me to go I was very ready to go. For all in tensive purposes we will just call him ex-husband, even though he really isn't legally yet. Well he kept running hot and cold on my leaving, at first he was all about my leaving Germany, I hadn't really a place to go until the first of the year and also I didn't want to leave my best friend/chosen sister alone for the holidays, this was September by the way, he was admit that I go saying he didn't want me in his house eating his food spending his money. My social worker I was seeking therapy from told me she would write a letter on my behalf saying it was in my best interest that I stay till the new year.

She didn't have to, for he soon went cold about my leaving, claiming he didn't have the time to deal with the early return of dependents paperwork. This after I had agreed to his ridicules separation agreement, since he told me he would not sign the proper papers till I signed the agreement. Nothing ever did come of those agreements though, for he and I could not come to an agreement, I had even made big exceptions, but still he would not sign. I had also gotten some very bad legal advice from the legal office on post. They had told me the loans I had taken out in my name only he could not take in the divorce (I now know untrue) that he had to refinance. I gave him plenty of time to refinance, or I was going to start selling the stuff those loans paid for in order to help pay off the loans. He was outraged, a spoiled child who had gotten toys and was upset that he had to pay for them or lose them. Well he put a restraining order on me staying that I couldn't take anything. Well that just put everything in his possession so he should pay for it right?

After I got letters from the social worker, the Chaplin and legal, command finally stepped in and sent me home. I had to rush home though leaving things untied, luckily my best friend was able to keep my personal items and have them shipped with her stuff back to the U.S. For he had already filed for divorce and I had to be in the states to answer it. So two days after I got permission to leave I left.

The End Yet the Begging

 A note

It is my hope that with this blog that people will get a better view of what Military wives, in bad situations
I was trapped in a foreign country with really no sense of support. I had friends and a social worker but really no organisation on group to help me. This is my story the begging is quite long and tedious... but as I obtain my freedom I hope it becomes more interesting.  As I started typing the words just came poring out.




The End Yet the Begging

To begin with I am a woman of 26 years who married when she was 20 years old to a boy who within a month of our wedding left for basic training for the United States Army.  After he completed basic and specialised training he and I moved to Germany. Things seemed happy enough, though looking back a bit dysfunctional but what marriage in the first year is not. In Dec of 2005 he left for a year to Iraq.

 We survived the deployment well enough, it wasn't till he came back that things went oh so very down hill. We fought alot so we went to couples counseling, I worked on me, but when it came to him to work on himself he did not, he refused to go any longer. Three years of broken promises and a husband who would not be happy and no matter how hard I tried to please him, it was not enough. I took out loans so he could get his "toys", he had his "dream car" which cost us $1000.00 a month or more. On top of that he kept getting it in accidents. Unhappily married and off to Iraq again he went. I had decided that when he got back he either got help for his problems, or I was going to leave. I couldn't live with the yelling, the put downs, being taken for granted, broken promises, being told that I took the sex out of sexy and he had even slapped me out of anger once.

Well I didn't get a chance to give him that ultimatum, I had to leave my current position at the Bank on post due to unsavory working conditions and harassment. When I had told him of it, and my plans to find another job....it all came out. He had told me that my job was the only thing keeping our marriage going, when I had asked him about love he told me he hadn't loved me in years. That he had made a list of things he liked and disliked about me, the dislikes where much longer and the likes were stupid. I cried for five minutes in the German version of Walmart, this is where I was he told me this on the cell phone. I cried for five minutes in the embrace of a friend then came to the realisation that I was FREE.

I could cut my hair off, get the tattoo I had always wanted and perhaps find love again, a good and healthy love. Now all I had to do was to get out of Germany.............